Thursday, August 9, 2012

An email I won't send.

"Hi Krissy,

I'd like to attempt to reconcile.

I'll be completely sincere and give you my reasons;

1) I regret burning my bridges with you.  I think you're a good person and I enjoyed spending time with you.

2) We are undoubtedly going to be a part of the same community and I don't want to have an anxiety attack for 2 days after everytime I run into you.

I'd be open to meeting in person or chatting through IM or e-mail.


Wait wait... let me get this straight. I am supposed to care about your panic attacks? Really? When I had a panic attack at your house and your response was to send me an email telling me that I am a bad mother and a horrible person and you've given me so many chances and you are just done. (I was never told I was given chances. This was a big shock.) You can't watch someone be as terrible to their children as I am to mine.

And I'm supposed to care about your panic attacks? Really? 

The reason we will undoubtedly be part of the same community is because you are telling me that you will join the group I asked you to stay out of. After I didn't leave my house for a year. Because of the fucking panic attacks you contributed to. I'm not going to say they are all your fault. I've had panic attacks for too many years to blame you. But you certainly make them worse. And I have studiously avoided every place I thought you might be.

But I should worry about you. And you feel bad about burning bridges. Well, I believe in natural consequences. Maybe next time you are having a bad day you won't take it out on someone else and tell them they are bad and disgusting.


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